Afrosays to me

…random excerpts from my communions with the AfroMuse

Why I go to church August 25, 2010

Filed under: Scenic — afrosays @ 10:12 am
Tags: , , , ,

it was Sunday a few days ago so this is what I was meant to do:

Put on a flowing white gown and run around the streets of Lagos, beating a prayer warrior tune on my Gong only because AfroSays:




“Mummy, I’m not going to church today”, I declared that Sunday morning. I was just back from my first year in the university and I felt that I had earned the right to freedom.

“After all, Brother Chima doesn’t go” I continued, in an attempt to create a solid premise for the expected argument. Brother Chima is my good-for-nothing, thirty two year old sibling who still stays at the house with us. His early retirement from life started seven years ago when he returned from the university, mid-semester. He was already in his third year when the school discovered that he wasn’t a valid student.We had all been fooled into believing that the Student Union had declared yet another strike till a student from the same school was accepted as intern in mum’s department at work. With further probing, mother found out about my brother’s fake admission although he never admitted it. He gave up on life shortly afterward and gradually retreated into his now obese self. He probably managed thirteen words per week since then, most of which were related to how fresh the bread was.
He was at the dining table, adding to his oversize gut when I took my revolutionary stand with mum. I had talked to him about it the night before and even though I wasn’t really expecting any help from him, at least I was sure he would keep his usual silent demeanor.
The chair creaked and we all looked in his direction, expecting some foolish comment about the bread. He was famous for such stupid interruptions.
We had almost turned back in indifference and mum was about to give me a piece of her mind when he pointed a half-eaten slice in my direction asking, as if mockingly, “Do you want to be like me?”
I went to church.



12 Responses to “Why I go to church”

  1. anonymous Says:

    lol, cute!,….. ur stories are short n nice, i find them interesting n i love ur blog

  2. Nife O Says:

    LMAO iWould have also gone to church not wanting to be like Bro.Chima

    Good laugh…

  3. Adia Says:

    lol!! yes to church!

  4. Tosin Oye Says:

    well finished message surely absorbed! keep it up man

  5. ronke Says:

    Nice 1 dear.

  6. Macallonies Says:

    Now this one is funny. Harsh though (on your brother) but somehow its so smooth that im totally convinced he earned it… Your writing feels like a swig of good scotch or vodka made out of berries…

  7. sheyhun Says:

    I like this bunches. Without being wordy it hits the point. Good one.

  8. evabenjamin Says:

    Would u still have gone if Bro Chima was skinny and not obese??? LOL

  9. TheManya Says:

    Lmao!!!! This is lovely

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