Afrosays to me

…random excerpts from my communions with the AfroMuse

Healing cripples March 1, 2011

Filed under: Abstract — afrosays @ 2:22 pm
Tags: , ,

So the muse eventually came through and I just submitted my Commonwealth story today – the last day possible, TownCrier Betty thinks it’s superb but like a jaded kitchen woman, I’m the one who knows how much salt I did not add. I’d have put it up here but for copyright issues that I agreed to. Who is Betty? My dark Betty? You can read Betty’s first interesting venture into blogville HERE. She usually does DARK and CREEPY but she was invited to use one of them SugarCane type gongs so…

Bottom line, Imma have one of Betty’s dispatches played out on this gong as soon as I can. I love her like that!

Thing is, doing all that sensible writing for the Commonwealth competition drained the goddess because she’s used to the less-than-classic, exuberant material that she’s been dishing out so far. However, she knows we all need to hear a little ‘something-something’ so she still sent this along.

One stroke because this is an Afro-Quickie. Please enjoy:

HEALING CRIPPLES

... Be healed ...

P: “The lord shall do great things today ahhh!”
C: “Amen!”
P: “He shall perform miracles today ahhh!”
C: “Amen!”
P: “He shall heal the sick and raise the dead ahhh!”
C: “Amen!”
P: “I feel the Spirit moving ahhh! Put your hands on wherever the devil has held you bound ahhh!”
“Receive your healing ahhh!”
C: “Ameeeen!”
P: “I say receive your healing ahhh!”
C: “Ameeeen!”
P: “Receive your testimony ahhh!”
C: “Ameeen!”
P: “Let all those with an unwavering faith in the lord begin to come forward for impartation by laying of hands”

A sizable crowd approaches the altar.
P begins impartation by laying of hands, resulting in high pitched shrieks, tumultuous vibrations of the body, sudden fainting and spiritual slaying.
P approaches the wheel chair line and begins to pull the passengers out, they all immediately adopt a clumsy gait and soon begin to walk properly amidst frenzied hallelujahs and feverish, charismatic music.
P is not done with the line, when he suddenly realizes something and returns to the non-crippled.
Brother calmly approaches P with a handgun and advises P to heal his crippled mother or die.
P pulls crippled mother out of wheelchair and cripple mother quickly adopts clumsy gait and soon begins to walk very properly.
P goes berserk, giving praises to God.
Brother shoots P anyway.
Crippled mother then explains to all that she was never crippled.
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10 Responses to “Healing cripples”

  1. BettyBoop Says:

    Dark Betty grins! An evil grin.

  2. obafuntay Says:

    eeeya. A miracle service gone bad. LOL.

  3. Olumide Olajide Says:

    nice twist.lov it.

  4. Nifesimi Says:

    lmaooo na wa oh that woman no gbadun at all lol

  5. afrosays Says:

    @Olumide : Thanks bruv!

    @Azuja – Scary how? BTW I keep visiting your blog for new content and I keep getting disappointed. Be kind to your fans naa!

    @Nifesimi – It’s good to see you again.

  6. Ayo Says:

    hahaha,u don dey madttt (sauce kid style). nice one


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